Sunday, November 2, 2008

Wings to Fly...

"I can never see you doing anything else" "You are so wonderful with the kids"

Those where the words of a parent a few days ago. I really liked that kind of stuff, you know it made me feel good. I helped me realize that I was doing a good job.

A year ago I had given myself a time limit on how long I was going to teach..."3 years I said"...then it's time to fly! But the thing is that I was already burnt out, I was tired of teaching and I wanted out. It had been a real roller coaster of emotions because I had been working at the same place for so many years. I had grown there, built many wonderful relationships, had many hilarious children stories and on and on...but I was not happy.

Change is hard, and there is certainly changes happening at my job...changes that a lot of people decided that were not going to stick around for...including me. I was scared to go anywhere, even the idea of leaving my job scared my socks of. I learned to tell myself that there was no way I could make it out there, or that there was a chance that I could make it anywhere else.

That was until a few weeks ago when I applied for another job...there was sense of accomplishment just in applying. I finally began believing that there was a chance for me to come out of the box I've been hiding in. I had no idea if they would even consider since i had no previous experience in anything other than children...to my surprise they called me back.

I had my first interview on Wednesday Oct. 29th, they said "we will let you know next week" and by 3:30 pm Friday Oct. 31st I was being offered a new job. So much for next week. I could not believe what I was about to do...but I did it. I accepted the job and now I am leaving the place I have been working at for 8years. The same place I did so much personal growing and had so much history in. I'm afraid...so afraid of failing. My husband is so wise and said to me "If God didn't want you to have this job he would have not opened the door" that gave me some peace...I still have dreams though...I see myself walking out of that building and looking back and falling apart...I know....sad.....but I have such an attachment to this place. I prayed and prayed and I decided that no matter how much fear may be in my heart I will do this...

"I will throw myself out there trusting that God will give me wings to fly"

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.


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2 comments:

Tish said...

I am so proud of you!!!
I am sure you will be a vital part of your new job's environment!! Good Luck and Congratulations to you!!

Wes Van Fleet said...

God is placing you in a certain job for you to influence those around you. Just be yourself and they will notice something different about you. What an opportunity!!